Brain Candy
I’ll admit it. I pretty much only read brain candy. And by “read”, you should know that I mostly mean listen to audio books on my long commute to work. I’ve never really read deep, meaningful novels. But since I’ve become a parent, my taste in books has swung to the exclusively brainless, purely entertainment kind of books.
The only books that really break out of this mold are child development/What to Expect books. I’ve given up on reading “parenting” books after a brief meltdown with some crazy book about the importance of crying for infants, which mostly just made me cry as I listened to Bink cry instead of comforting him. My Mom gave me the excellent advice of just not listening to that book, or any book that didn’t feel right to me. Hey, Bink was two weeks old and I was sleep deprived. Otherwise, I’d like to think I could have thought of that on my own.
Anyway, back to my frivolous literary tastes. For reading such junk, I’m quite picky. I like to read series, because I’m compulsive and start at the beginning and read them all in order. I almost always read mysteries, crime novels, or something with a supernatural theme. If it has a vampire in it, I’ll probably read it.
I want books that I have to pay just enough attention to that I’m engaged in the story, but not so much that I have to really think. I want fluff. Happy stories. Happy endings. No main characters dying. Everyone should end up with whoever they were supposed to. And I shouldn’t cry. So this means that I normally haven’t touched whatever the “must read” book is, anything that is part of Oprah’s bookclub, or whatever the heart-wrenching, beautifully written book you are about to tell me is your very favorite.
Since my local library is a tiny little branch, I reserve my audio books ahead of time. I’m usually pretty good at timing how long it will take me to listen to one vs. how long it will take the library system to ship the next one to my branch. And lately, I’d been downloading the books directly to my iPod (look at me, so technologically savvy).
Last week, however, my careful planning hit a small snafu. The library was doing system maintenance. No books were shipped out, no one moved a single place in line waiting for digital downloads, and I found myself without anything to listen to and a few days with lots of extra driving ahead of me.
I hurried into my tiny library branch after work and picked up the three best choices I could find: Bloodsucking Fiends, The Face, and The Lovely Bones. I realize The Lovely Bones goes against EVERYTHING I’ve just told you about what I read. But I keep hearing how great it was. And it sounded so interesting. And, blah, blah, blah.
I popped the CD in the first of my long drives and made 11 tracks in before calling it quits. It’s beautifully written. The main character, Susie, is very sweet. I wanted to like it. But…
It’s heartbreaking. Part of the story focuses on the parent’s grief and I just…couldn’t. I. Just. Couldn’t. I can’t imagine, don’t want to imagine, will not imagine how horrible losing a child is. And I certainly won’t do it as a form of entertainment.
Oddly enough, I kept thinking about the book. Susie’s voice is very strong and I wanted to know what happened. I made it to the fourth disc before I gave up for good. I feel a little bit like a failure. I just couldn’t continue to make myself sick.
This is the second book I’ve quit reading for this reason since Bink was born. I was briefly part of a book club who loved gut-wrenching, tear you apart, beautifully written prose. I stopped participating when I realized all my (limited) reading time was going to things that were making me weep.
So, for now, I’m back in my happy little cocoon. I’m listening to Storm Prey (the 20th book in a series I’ve read all of). And I’m deciding I really need to be OK with my choice to read crap.
I’m an educated woman. And I choose to read brain candy. There.
Now you know my secret. Feel free to judge me.
Crys
August 30th, 2010 @ 5:20 pm
I don’t really read the sad, depressing stuff either, and I don’t even have a child to blame for it…I just don’t want to get sad and cry.
I love the prey novels! (and I watched the Lovely Bones movie and was utterly depressed)
Menda
August 31st, 2010 @ 10:26 am
I agree completely. I don’t read books that depress me anymore, and I don’t watch a lot of the wonderful, Oscar-worthy films for the same reason. There’s enough in life that’s depressing already, and the small amount of time I have to spend on something other than work or my family’s well-being is too precious to me to spend on something that doesn’t make me happy.
Tiffany
August 31st, 2010 @ 3:09 pm
It’s so broad and random the ways in which becoming a mother changes us. What books to read certainly is one of them…
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